Even Paris Hilton knows she sucks
Well, at least the obvious doesn’t escape her: She knows that her and her wonky eye will make a piece of crap movie even crappier. But props to Page Six for continuing to call her a “celebutard”:
PARIS Hilton is desperately trying to distance herself from yet another movie fiasco.
The celebutard - whose screen credits include the self-made porno flick “One Night in Paris” and the box-office bomb “House of Wax” - starred in National Lampoon’s “Pledge This,” which was set for a release earlier this month.
According to one insider, “The premiere was supposed to have been on Oct. 11 in Chicago, but Paris called at the last minute and canceled, claiming she had to promote her album. The producers didn’t want to have the premiere without her because she’s the biggest star in the movie, which also features Simon Rex and Randy Spelling, so they rescheduled for Oct. 28.”
But now Hilton has told the producers she won’t likely be attending then, either.
“The movie is horrific,” said our source. “It is a limited release that will likely go straight to video. Paris doesn’t really want to be associated with it. Her movie career is not exactly booming, and she needs to not be seen as a flop. Also, the movie has a lot of topless women in it, and she is trying to distance herself from the whole porn thing.”
Distance herself from the whole porn thing? Isn’t that like water trying to distance itself from the whole “wet” thing? If she’s trying not to be seen as a flop, she’s attempting the impossible: she’s sucked at everything she’s ever tried, be it acting, singing, dancing or even modeling with her googley eye. Sucking is all she knows how to do.
Well, that’s not true: I’ve seen her sex tape, and she can’t even do that right.
October 23rd, 2006 at 2:19 am
hahahaha you said googley eye. googley. heehee i can’t stop saying it! although googley is too cute of a word for her messed up eye. googley. googley. i love it! not her eye, the word.